10 Ways to Bless Your Children (Part 2)

Perhaps you have children.  Your children may be small, adolescents, or they may be married and have a mortgage of their own.  I have two children.  They are now 23 and 19.  I continue to be their dad.  It is the same role, but the work of being a dad is a little different when children are that age.  The basic principles, however, never change.

 
The following is part 2 of "10 Ways to Bless Your Children."  If you missed the first post, you can get to it here.  You may have others that you would like to add.

 
A few suggestions:

 
6.  Say only what communicates value, respect, and love.  Choose to never say or do anything that will humiliate.   Sometimes, families will tell embarrassing, humiliating, stories about their children.  The child is embarrassed at this but then the parent says, "I’m just kidding."  (In other words, "Since I think this is funny, you shouldn’t let this bother you.")  Listen, we all do things in our families that are silly, stupid, mindless, careless, etc.  I have found that it is much better for me to tell about something silly or stupid that I did — not my children.  Children need to know that homes are safe places where one’s mistakes are not announced to the world.

 
7.  Be your child’s greatest encourager.  Before you move on, think about this one.  Far too many parents are really not that encouraging.  It’s not that they have a critical spirit.  Rather, they just say nothing.  Children are not mind readers.  We can do better than just expecting them to know we are in their corner.  They need to hear it!  Make an effort to catch them doing something good, right, thoughtful, considerate, well done, etc. and point it out.  Highlight it!  "Hey, you really handled that situation very well."

 
8.  Pray for your children.  If you are not praying for them each day, who is?  Regardless of the age, they need you to lift them up before the Lord in prayer each day.  Think about their day.  Think about their setting.  Think about the people they will be with. Pray about these situations.

 
9.  Give them what they need not what they want.   Many of us are very busy people.  We have a lot going on.  So often, parents will feel guilty about how busy they are and so decide to give them a new "toy."  Yet, we do our children no favors when we give them most everything they want.  The point is this: Too many children grow up getting all the things they want while little attention is given to what they really need.  Think about what your children really need if they are going to make it in this difficult world as obedient children of a loving God.

 
10.  Give your children something to look forward to when they come home.  Give them a beautiful home to look forward to.  That’s home — not house.  Anyone with enough money can build a beautiful house.  Our children need beautiful homes.  Homes that are filled with warmth, laughter, and love.  Beautiful homes are places where children can catch a glimpse of the loving God in the love of their parents.  These homes remind kids that no matter how bad the day is at school or with friends, they can alway come home.  

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  • http://spiritualoasis.wordpress.com Bill

    Great series, Jim. I’ve linked to both of these in my recent Points of Interest post. Blessings to you and yours,-bill 

  • Dionna

    Our children need more parents.. and homes like this.

  • Greg England

    Jim: I have a friend who, in many respects, is a great guy. Generous. Funny. Caring. Involved. But when it comes to relationship with his wife and son, he is continually putting them down. Today he can’t understand why there is not much of a relationship with his son. It’s because relationship has been replaced with anger from years of being put down and having his spirit wounded by dad.Always enjoy what you have to say. 

  • Jim Martin

    Thanks Bill–you are always very encouraging.

  • Jim Martin

    Greg, Thanks for that tragic but powerful story.  How sad.

  • Jim Martin

    Thank you Dionna–