Archive - November 19, 2007

Graciousness

November 19, 2007 in Gratitude with 17 Comments

coffee9.jpgGracious.  Now I like this word.  No, this word is reserved for people who recognize
that they are privileged to receive what they have been given.  Or as Fred Craddock once said, "The final act of grace is graciousness."  So what is a gracious
person?

 
A gracious person is slow to take credit and quick to lavish praise. 

A gracious person never seeks to embarrass another. Humiliating another is not in this person’s vocabulary.  (And
please don’t say something that humiliates another and then try to escape responsibility by saying, "I was only joking.")

 
A gracious person is always thanking others.  Do you go through an entire day without thanking another? 

A gracious person doesn’t monopolize the conversation. Someone else has something to offer.

 
A gracious person doesn’t try to play one-upmanship. (That’s nothing, you should have seen what I did!") 

A gracious person pays attention to people. Sometimes people come away from such conversations saying, "He made me feel like I was the most important person at that moment."

 
A gracious person desires to say what is appropriate. He doesn’t just say what is on his mind or whatever he might be thinking. (There is no redeeming value in emptying one’s mind of whatever fleeting thought has happened to land at the moment.)

 
A gracious person looks out for the comfort of others.<!–
A gracious person understands that she is not indispensable. You've
seen this person.  She desires constant attention.  She has a way of
constantly focusing most any conversation back on herself.  There is a
humility in realizing that you are dispensable. A gracious person constantly points out the good that he sees  "Would you like a cup of coffee?  What about a coke?  Can I get you a newspaper while I’m out?" 

 
A gracious person looks for the good.  Maybe
you are visiting a friend who lives in another place.  Instead of
pointing out the inadequacies of your friend’s community, you are
constantly finding things that are good.  "This cafe has outstanding
peach pie!  That was delicious."  "I just love the way you have planted
your garden.  It is beautiful!" 

 
I believe that in so many of us, there is a genuine hunger
to experience the beauty of graciousness.  After all, this is nothing
more than grace lived out.  And — that grace originates in the heart of God.

 
I’m
curious, what would you add to this list of ten?  I suspect you could
add another characteristic of a gracious person that might be helpful
to us all.

 
(This post has appeared on this blog before.  It seems appropriate for Thanksgiving week.)

Alone? (Maybe Not)

November 19, 2007 in Spiritual Life with 2 Comments

Starbucks.jpgSomewhere, there is a person reading this who feels alone.  You may be that person.

 
You may be a college student who feels alone.  It is late at night.  This past weekend, two of your friends boasted of how drunk they got and who they slept with.  Meanwhile, you feel very alone in your dorm.

 
You may be married but you feel alone.  Your husband is busy and preoccupied with his career.  Your children are growing up and you realize they will eventually be moving out and on their own.  Meanwhile, you wonder what the future holds for you.  You feel alone.

 
You may be a widow.  You loved and you received love.  Then, he passed away.  You try to stay very busy but the nights can be very long.  You feel alone.

 
You may be a young father.  You feel under incredible pressure.  You have some overwhelming credit card debt.  You are not sure about your future with this company.  This isn’t exactly what you thought life was going to be.  You feel alone.

 
You may be a person with a secret.  Maybe you are having an affair.  Maybe you have your eye on someone who you would really like to have an affair with.  Maybe you visit porn sites.  Maybe you have lost an incredible amount of money through gambling.  You don’t know what to do.  You feel like you can’t talk to even your closest friends about this.  So—you keep the secret within you.  And—you feel very, very alone.         

 
You may be a minister.  You sensed a call from God.  You went to seminary.  You began serving a church.  You work very hard.  Yet, you feel unappreciated and taken for granted and then feel small and petty for feeling that way.  You love God but you are not sure what to do with the ministry situation you are in.  You feel alone. 

 
Do any of these situations ring true for you?  Maybe.  Regardless of the situation, I suspect that many of you know what it is to feel very, very alone. 

 
The good news?  Jesus in his mercy and through his Spirit has given us his forever presence.
 

  • "Lo I will be with you always even to the end of the earth." (Mt. 28:20)
  • We are experiencing an ongoing transformation which comes from the Lord who is the Spirit.  (II Cor. 3:18)
  • The Spirit is actually renewing us each day even while outwardly we may be growing older physically.  (II Cor. 4:16)
  • The Spirit is a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come  (II Cor. 5:5)
  • The prophet Ezekiel on the promised return of God’s presence, "My dwelling place will be with them; I will be their God and they will be my people." (Ez. 37:27)