I’m forty-one years old and to this day when I see my dad we hug and kiss immediately.  And several times while we are together, he will say for specific reasons and others not so specific, "I proud of you."
Affection and words of affirmation are incredibly important.

From a father a son needs a role model, an encourager, a discipliner, a best friend but most importantly just love. From a mother a son needs a best friend, an encourager, a discipliner but most importantly just love.
I think love covers a multitude of things. Give a child love and you are giving them everything they need.

Milton,A great comment.  I agree with you completely.  So true about our culture sending many, many messages that "boys will be boys"–forever.It seems that many boys are just abandoned emotionally by their fathers (often when they need him most.)I also like very much about what you say regarding the role of a man. 

Richard (May)What a tribute to you and your Dad!  I have always had nothing but the highest respect for your dad.  This comment is one more reminder of why I deeply respect him.By the way–what a witness to your own children to be able to see this in their dad and grandfather.

Carl,Thank you for reminding all of us of the importance and priceless nature of affirmation.  This is so true.  As you indicate, it’s absence is painful. 

Thanks for your blog. I try to be there for my sons. I lost my father when I was a young boy . I missed him being there in my  best of times  and my worst of times.
 

This is a great post.  These are all good answers.  Unfortunately the men who need to hear all this advice don’t get it from their dads. because they were treated the same.  Or they don’t get it from any other resources either.  My father was in the military.  Add to that, he came from an Hispanic background.  So his idea of love was to put a roof over our heads, food on the table, and clothes on our back.  This answer didn’t come from him either.  I heard it from my step mother.   Because my father was in the military and he  separated from our mother when we were very young, we boys moved around a lot.  We were watched by paid caretakers or relatives.  The five years I finally did live with him, we spent no ‘one on one time’ together.  Dad was either watching television, working in the yard, behind the newspaper, at work, drinking with his friends, or disciplining us boys. Affection- yes, very important.  I never got any of that from my dad.  Love- yes, very important.  None was ever given by my dad in my eyes.Afirmation, yes also very important.  Never got any of that from my dad. Guidance, yes, very important.  Never got any guidance from my dad about life, sex, moral guidance, career, how to be a man, etc…. Funny, though he never gave me guidance into manhood, I distinctly remember throughout my life dad yelling at me and telling me I wasn’t a man!  Along with moving around a lot, which means no real sense of family or belonging, and the above reasons it left a big hole in my life.  So I was always looking for love everywhere else.  I was also a follower willing to follow anyone who would pay attention to me.  Spending most times with other families, getting into trouble, and even seeking sexual fulfillment from other men.  (Trying to get that love I never got from dad.) I grew up with no real sense of direction, self esteem, couldn’t make decisions, didn’t know how to build anything, didn’t care about sports, never wanted to grow up or old, and was more interested in having fun.So these are some of the things that happen when a boy doesn’t get what he needs from a dad.It’s great for you guys to constantly remind yourself about these issues.  But do more.  Spread the word.  If you see other young OR old men raising boys and the men are lacking in those areas with their sons……….. try to encourage and educate those guys in what they are doing!Just my own opinon.God bless those who listen to the Lord.Rey