The following are ten possible marriage pitfalls. Ignore these and put your marriage at risk.
1. Beware of ignoring your wife’s spiritual development while you focus on feeding yourself and the congregation. A ministry couple can easily drift apart spiritually.
2. Beware of assuming that because you read and talk theology that your work with Jesus is more authentic than that of your spouse.
3. Beware of dabbling in discipleship while you major in public events. The first step in ministry is following Jesus.
4. Beware of demanding that your spouse make you look good even when you behave immaturely or like a jerk at home.
5. Beware of discouraging your spouse from seeing a counselor or therapist because you are concerned that you might look bad.
6. Beware of thinking that your role or hard work gives you permission to slack off when you are home.
7. Beware of expecting your spouse will deal with the kids, bills, the maintenance of the house, and your social life so that you can focus on more “important” matters.
8. Beware of supposedly innocent flirting with a certain person in your church arrogantly thinking that you are way too smart or moral to do something stupid.
9. Beware of using your mind as a playground where you can run wild with fantasies and various temptations. Our thinking really does shape who we are.
10. Beware of speaking to your spouse in ways that are demeaning, childish, and disrespectful. This does nothing for your marriage but reveals your immaturity.
Question:
What would you add to this list?
Great post, Jim. #6 just about did us in. And the thing about it is we can so easily deceive ourselves into thinking we’re not doing things like this when we are! Thank you for putting these things out there on the shelf where we can reach them. You are exactly right that our thinking does shape us – so does our NOT thinking!