Fantasy.
Now that is what we used to do after Dallas Cowboy games. When I was growing up, Kip, Dale, Larry, Audie, and a few others would gather in someones front yard at the half-time of Cowboy games. There, we would throw the football, chattering and reliving the game. (The chatter was our best imitation of the radio announcer).
Staubach back to pass…
Hayes is in the end-zone! Touchdown!
Pearson’s gone deep! He’s got it! Touchdown!
On and on…We were Dallas Cowboys for an afternoon. We sacked quarterbacks just like Ed "Too Tall" Jones. We intercepted passes like Cliff Harris or Everson Walls.
Fantasy.
What a word! Today, it is a word that you might see on a large billboard as you drive into Dallas or Houston. An alluring woman is inviting you come to XXX Fantasy world, just off the Expressway. Or maybe it comes packaged in a quiet e-mail inviting you to check out a certain web site in the privacy of your home.
Fantasy often has to do with being preoccupied with what isn’t–or what shouldn’t be. It is not real. After all…
…you are married
…she is married
…you are single–not married to anyone
…the people on the film, in the magazine, in the paperback novel, etc. They don’t know you and don’t care about you.
…turn off the computer and the images are gone. They are just images.
Yet you may spend lots of time thinking and imagining. You begin to compare. Him to your husband. Her to your wife. Part of the lie is that we are comparing un-reality with reality. Carefully brushed images and people who have experienced surgical "enhancements" are being compared with real people with whom we have real relationships.
Most of all–It is wrong. It is wrong to live in an illicit fantasy world. Jesus warned that the heart was not to be a place for housing our lusts (Mt. 6 :28). It is to sin against your own body (I Cor. 6:18-20).
It is also very immature. One can spend more energy playing with make believe than relating to real people. People like your wife/husband, your children, and your friends.
Do I lose myself in the unreal world of fantasy? Or do I lose myself in the real world of loving my wife/husband, children, and friends?
Where do you begin? Ask yourself: Are there secrets or fantasies that I am spending a lot of time with? Do I enjoy and even look forward to this? What is this costing me? What about God and my relationship to him? What about my obedience to his desire for me? Is this the kind of man/woman that my spouse needs? Am I shortchanging my children by living in the world of fantasy?
“There is no shame in the struggle. The shame comes from the secrecy. And our secrets are polluting our assemblies”. This is a great quote from a blog I read the other day. What conviction!